Time to take a little Advent break from the seemingly never-ending battles with the forces of Modernism, Silly Synodality, etc., etc. etc. So here’s some light-hearted silliness of a slightly different kind! Have a blessed Advent and Christmas season!
‘Tis the season, one would expect…
It’s that time of the year again! Hank Igitur productions proudly presents “The Father Jimmy Halloween Special!”
Enjoy.
If you prefer viewing on YouTube, here’s your link!
The Pope caused quite a stir recently when he supposedly used very spicy language while discussing the suitability of this or that group of seminary candidates with a group of Italian bishops. But did he actually use the word all the translators claim he used? Or is this yet again just a simple misunderstanding? Popesplainer Pete has the answers that everyone needs to hear!
This supposed gaffe comes almost at the very beginning of June, a particularly important month for celebrating the three cardinal virtues of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion. What on earth was the Pope thinking when he used the word that got so many people upset? Turns out he was thinking about lunch…
We’ve seen it before: Make an ambiguous statement to a prominent journalist, issue an ambiguous motu proprio or write a book with a footnote. Don’t say anything blatantly heterodox. Come dangerously close. Flirt with heterodoxy…but then step back. Create confusion. Leave a loophole open here or there and wait for someone in lower authority to interpret/implement a “version,” “an adaptation” of whatever New Thing you want to institute. It will be novel at first, and you’ll issue some sort of tut-tutting denial, and laughingly brush aside concerns. “No, of course not! It may look like ‘X,’ smell like ‘x” and even walk and talk like ‘X,’ but it’s really not ‘X’ at all! If you think we’re trying to sneak in ‘X’ just because it looks almost exactly like ‘X,’ you’re just being mean-spirited and rigid, not to mention silly! Besides, there are a lot of people out there who really, really want ‘X.’ Their lived experiences are awash in ‘X,’ and ‘X’ is who/what they want to be. We need to accompany them as they journey in their own way with their own lived experiences in such a way that ‘X’ can become a Catholic reality for them.”
In this repeating scenario, ‘X’ can be just about anything. In 2024, one of the most exciting “X’es” is women’s ordination, starting of course with the relatively low-hanging fruit of “lady deacons.” Step one is to come up with a pseudo-deaconette who will look, walk and talk like an ordained deacon, but not actually be one, don’t you see? That’s the first seemingly harmless but absolutely essential step on the road to eventually (after a couple dozen synods, perhaps) having full-on lady priestesses.
The playbook is out there, and it’s pretty easy to read their gameplan.
The question is...how far will it go?
Do we really think that some day there will be honest-to-goodness priestesses in the Catholic Church? They’ll try. They’ll definitely try. Praise God, they will not succeed.
But…just as a disturbing and frivolous little exercise, let’s just imagine (for entertainment purposes only!) how such a bizarre scenario might play out. Such a mental exercise seems like it would do well in a comic book format. So, without further ado, we present to you “The Adventures of Pope Karen.”
The Synodally Synodistic Synods on Synodality have set the stage. The time for deaconettes is now. Popesplainer Pete shows us how this marvelous new breakthrough in Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion will come about!
It’s high time that artful popesplaining settles the issue of the infamous “St. Peter’s Slap” once and for all.
Let us popesplain to you exactly why Raymond Cardinal Burke had to go. When you finally open your eyes and understand, you’ll see that the Vatican did him a profound favor.
PopeSplainer Pete will set the record straight for you. It’s simple. Really…
“Our understanding of simple addition has grown over the years, and we must honor the lived experience of those who aren’t good with numbers…”
This second episode of the PopeSplainer Pete Show will set the record straight on basic addition, Synodal-Style!
There’s a new YouTuber out there coming up with explanations so bizarre that you’ll spit your coffee all over your computer screen.
I don’t know what it is about people who enjoy contorting themselves into almost unbelievable shaps as they bend this way and that in a desperate attempt to explain away whatever the latest nonsense coming from our hierarchy might be on any given day. It’s more than a mere artform…it’s almost a science.
I am talking, of course, about “popesplaining.” For those who might be unfamiliar with the term, popesplaining is the act of convincing a skeptical listener that a particular action by a pope (or by extension, any of his close advisors, advocates, etc.) is not in fact inconsistent with established Church doctrines/teachings/practices, or with plain old common sense for that matter. You might have heard of some of them. Mr. Lofton and Mr. Lewis are but a couple of examples.
Well, dear readers, there is a NEW Popesplainer out there in YouTubeLand. His name is PopeSplainer Pete. This guy is in a class all by himself. But don’t take my word for it. Here’s his inaugural episode which aired recently.